Emotion in Strength Sport: A Beautiful Struggle
In order to set the tone, the precedent even, for this concept, I will open with a preamble on what this means to me. This is about myself, but through the lens of another in observation.
Emotion
Distress and pandemonium around him, he puts his head down. He is unsure of his abilities, despite having every right to feel the opposite. He is nervous, but he doesn’t show it. He is worked up into an emotional frenzy, on the outside it appears as if he is about to cry, but on the inside is the controlled rage of 1000 warriors defending their homeland. The headphones he uses as a cloak to avoid talking about what is to come serve as a shield first, a form of emotional crutch second, he only takes them off when he absolutely has to. The powerful scent of ammonia rids his brain of negative thought, the headphones have to come off now, but he has transformed. He is an introvert, he does not enjoy being watched, or talking about what he is doing, he just likes doing. But this introvert is the center of attention when those headphones come off. He sees nothing but the bar in front of him, he could care less about anything that is going on in that moment besides what he is there to do. He is free of all anguish, all doubt, all insecurity, for 9 minutes in totality. He is stoic and unassuming, but he carries an exuberance that attracts others to feel the same. The bar hits the floor, the day is over, and everything went like it was supposed to, but yet, he is moved to tears. Why? Because he cares. He structured his entire routine around this, he made the sacrifices most his age are not willing to indulge in, he even gave up a smidge of sanity for the possibility of a breakthrough and for that 30 second span, he felt complete. He felt validated. But he knew it would not last, that the moment was as fleeting at the outcome, and he wanted to cherish every ounce of that feeling he could get. The day is over, the tears dry, the void is back, but it is slightly filled, instead of completely open. He yearns to get back to that, but he knows what got him there, it was maniacal preparation, and back to preparation he went, knowing full well that it COULD all be for naught. This is a harrowing feeling, but one he believes in. A patient but beautiful optimism surrounds him, he is capable, he is a realist, he is the one who people say he is. Committed by design, executes by proxy, the journey is the process but the outcome is so much sweeter when he knows he earned it.
Powerlifting and Strength Sport as a Whole is An Emotional Rollercoaster
Chances are, if you have been to a powerlifting meet, you have witnessed someone who is competing or coaching, be moved to tears. But why is that? To be objective, powerlifting usually does not have a lot of external HARD variables attached to outcomes. Strictly talking about the local level, there is usually no life or death stakes at play. But my retort to that is, does there need to be? You see, everyone who engages in the sport, has a story. You have a former athlete who is itching for competition again, you have the mother of 3 who is trying to stay in shape, you have the precocious young gun who is ready to set the world on fire. Regardless, everyone who gets under that bar, has a story, and I really respect that.
You do not know what people are going through to get to this point, much less what is driving them to continue. Therefore when we see non-harmful acts of emotion, I encourage you all to really think before you judge. The person in the back huffing ammonia and grunting, might be insecure and needs to detach to perform. The person with their eyes closed, seemingly ignoring everyone, is most likely not doing so to be a jerk, they simply get overstimulated when trying to juggle their focus with interaction. All that is before the lift, but what I admire is how each person takes to the bar in their own unique way. Some with intent, some with caution, some with laser focus, others with borderline reckless abandon. What we do requires both strength and precision. Strength and precision require maximum focus (in your own unique way) and focus is very fatiguing. I find that for me, the emotional comedown of a powerlifting meet is akin to what a minor comedown from an upper-style drug would in theory be like. You are elevated to an emotional state that is fragile in that you are operating at the highest arousal possible to an equally fragile zone where you are at your lowest, it is truly amazing to see this happen in real time.
“Ya okay Erik, but that still does not explain why people cry after a meet, or even during!”
But it does! As humans, we are programmed to feel, and sometimes the euphoria of seeing hard and diligent work manifest as a breakthrough is overwhelming. This goes back to you never know what people are going through as they get under that bar for a heavy squat and I think as a whole, powerlifting specifically welcomes those breakthroughs with open arms. Just because someone squats 30kg does not mean they do not have a right to celebrate it, in fact, they have every right to and then some.
Frustration
Aside from joy, the most common aspect of emotion you will find in this sport, and most of the ones similar to it, is frustration. I have thought about why this is, but I think it boils down to a few things.
This should be easy. The powerlifts are in theory, simple movements.
Usually with most aspects, more effort is reflected with more positive outcomes.
The personality type that gravitates to this sport is usually one that is either: analytical to a fault, non-analytical to a fault, or very high-strung.
Why is this a problem?
These lifts are not easy. It has become popular to say PL training is easy, the fact of the matter is at the highest level, it really is not. In most sports, as you progress, the game get’s easier and easier, to a degree. The more you play games of basketball, the slower the game gets in your perception and you will become progressively better and better at your given skills. With the sport we do, the practice is not only sport-specific and refining, but it is equally as fatiguing. You can shoot 100 free throws and be fine the next day, for the majority of us, if you do 100 deadlifts in a workout, you will be so incapacitated that you will be out of commission for a few days! Your reward in powerlifting for lifting heavy is being prepared to lift even heavier, so as you get better, the process of getting stronger gets harder and harder.
This blends into the second concept in the sense that, the harder you try, the less likely you are to adapt positively. For instance, failing a deadlift twice, then using straps and then finally hitting it on the third try, might sound like something that would in theory be a good thing, but in practicality, 3 attempts at a supramaximal load more than likely throws out your training week outright. Or doing extra sets and reps, pushing to failure on every exercise. You will regress and maladapt this way, so effort does not always equal positive results.
The problem with concept #3 is not in the person themselves, it is how they react to each given situation. Person A who is analytical will hyper-analyze their training and think too heavy a set of leg extensions on Monday threw off their squat on Saturday. Person B who is non-analytical, will not eat or drink anything all day, go workout and struggle, and assume it is a bad program. Person C, will react violently or emotionally when something goes wrong, venting their frustration is a non-productive manner.
The truth that needs to be told in regard to frustration, is you need to let it run it’s course. I have been so frustrated with this sport at times that I wanted to explode. However, I cannot recall a time where I did not make it out of that, and many times, rather quickly. To people who experience this, I always recommend to allow yourself to feel what you are feeling, then be proactive and not reactive. As long as you learn from it, there is no harm in being human.
The Beautiful Struggle
The process and journey of strength development and athletic success is truly a beautiful struggle.
Beautiful in the sense of, you will see every emotion possible, possibly in one workout, or competition, all titrated into one singular effort and watching that amalgamation take form into a single entity is quite awe-striking to me.
However, this sport, this game, this life, is a struggle. We do not live life in utopian set of circumstances and as much as we do not like to admit it, things effect us. The hardest outer-shelled person, still has things that bother them that effect their training. For me, it is over-stimulation and being over-whelmed by interaction. That really bothers me. For others, they need that, the biggest key is identifying what makes you tick and what makes you struggle and seeking to balance the two out, as you do need to put yourself in uncomfortable circumstances every once and a while in order to grow.
I love this process and it is one that that brought me to my knees in anguish, but also in euphoria. If I can have most of the people who choose to work with me experience the latter, and avoid the former, I will feel as if I am doing what I need to do in this sport.
To Utopia,
Erik